i feel sick..okay i am sick. but its worst having to take 5 differebt types of medicine each time=.=
madness..my fever is unstable. temp going up and down..
sad..so boring..but well i can rest more and sleep later. haha
ging back on thursday. but asking clarice to pass me my SS textbk to me tmr.
haha cuz thurs is SS CA thats why.
i havent studied at all..haha
not having PE on thursday.
cant go for choir on friday..
madness larh. i want togo for choir..damn it larh..
doctors say just not this week..
oh well..hope sch's fine.

haha well..i'm sort of in a mixed feeling right now.
but wadever it is, i'm not gonna let that defeat me.
even though times are tough but i know i can pull through.
i've thought about it. And i really find it pointless to be sad over things that i cant help in.
so i've decided to face the truth. even if it kills me like hell.
i think i'm just being too sensitive over things lately.
even though i didnt say it out (cuz i dont think i want to)
but well, i'll just let things flow the way they want to.
i cant be thinking and caring about everything. might be that sometimes people have different behavious cuz of certain things or moods. so i cant really control that.
people think differently and act differently=) and thats what makes everyone who they are.
that is what makes everyone special. so i'm not gonna force myself to be someone i hate.
and i dont want people to force themselve too=). well, sry if it sounds like madness.=)
haha. i feel that my heart is being held by a stone. if only i can put it down.
i usually can do it, but i cant recently.=( well haha i think i need to fix that.
phew. sometimes its weird. like u wanna care about certain things but its like none of your business but if you dont care also like not very nice=/ contridicting but true.
well...i really just wanna lead my life happily with everyone. getting along with everyone well and nicely. talk things out when something is wrong or when someone did something wrong.
i dont like to get lost in things like u dont know u did something wrong and no one tells you about it=/ but then again, who doesnt? well every fall makes one stronger. every turn makes life more fun. haha. i get turmoils every now and then but i hope i can just dump it all away. i dont like to be caught in bad situations but who does? well okay i'm crapping haha. i dont know what to do with myself now actually. well u know what. i think i should just do things that benefit everyone. haha i've sort of have a rough idea of what to do. i hope its for the best=)
well enough of all this stuff..hmm..i rmb i forgot to blog about smething yesterday haha.
okay so in sch got this damn funny incident. haha the clarice incident!
haha okay the thing goes like this:
clarice needs to go to the staff fm to find mr wong. so belle and me followed. haha
she has this pouch with her ( the HL or marigold milk give one) haha
the funny thing is we were waiting for mr wong. then she like very bored so got this teacher open the door. then aft tt the door was closing so she put the pouch the strap at the door there and it got caught in between the doors! haha then we though can pull out. but cannot!=O haha
then the teacher need open the door to help her get it out! haha then we laugh damn hard larh. clarice face become red colour! haha. damn funny! then mr desmond ng was at the photo copier machine there so he saw then he laugh out loudly. haha.
okay theres the other one at badminton=) isabelles newly invented jump!
haha so now she has 2! ones the start jump and the other the moon jump=D haha
very cute larh. haha so funny eh=X haha but its her haha one and only isabelle! yeah!
so glad to have friends like them=DD
*thanks novy, you're really a great girlfren=) always giving me a ear.
*thanks mainey, even though think are different but i seriously think you're a great friend=) always there=)
*thanks isabelle, for always making things funny=) one of a kind.
*thanks clarice, for letting me laugh at you=X really enjoyed your company=)
theres this last person who i want to thank=) thats rachel. haha my crapping partner.
thanks for crapping with me=)
thank you everyone all of my friends! i'll never forget and never regret=)

[[okay so now i'm in a very drifty mood because yoon jihoo totally steal my breath away! so sweet eh! haha oopps haha! yeah=) okay larh. BBF/BOF totally rocks. i knw everyone's watching it but still its nice=) thats why its so popular^^) yay!

okay..let me recap on the whole week.

monday: everyone saw my new haircut. asked abt it and comment on it.
well i dont really care wad others thnk larh. haha i just cut it for fun marh=D
thats all that matters right now. had fun..i thnk but its so dumb of me to bring all my bks.
thr no lessons tt day=.= haha well aft tt stayed with dance clique to c thm rehearse=)
no matter what happens they are always the best^^ yeah.
haha to me all my frens are the best larh. the best frens u can ever find on earth=D
no doubt about tt=)) yeah so went home late..sort of=) but its okay larh. haha

tuesday:lol the most enjoyable day=D yeah i cant rmb wad happen in class=X
but well anw..aft class we (me helissa janine) met and hang arnd in sch to wait for jiemin
that was our initial plan but at the end we didnt cuz we dont have the time.
we had to go hme and get ready for esplanade later. =D yeah
OH! and round of applause to AHS choir^^ they were awesome=D yeah yeah.
really blended and nice=) so i was out till arnd 10 plus thn i reach home.
cuz aft the concert we(janine me jiemin) went to shop at HMV(loved) haha yeah
damn fun larh. thn we took pictures in the MRT=D yeah.
so it was a really great night i had=D really worth the time haha. and i get to c me pri sch mates.

wednesday:hmm...weds. the longest day in my time table.=/ i cant really rmb what happened but i guess its a fun day too=) hehe.

thursday:hmm..hmm..haha okay this was ystdy anw. so aft sch, we( me mainey rachel belle rice) went to KFC to eat our beloved lunch..(oh did i mention that i am having really poor appetite these days i dont knw why=/) well anw,we ate and crapped=DD really happy!! yeah. okay so aft tt we went to walk arnd cuz i need to get my transparent ear studs frm the bluez cuz only thr got sell the really thick ones=X yeah. cuz ms goh say need to chng. yeah and we hanged arnd till 5 plus? yeah thn i went home for tuition.

friday:yeah! today the best day ever! i havent had this mush fun in ages=D but still i miss everyone's old self. i'm so sry. i cant help it larh=D but people change so i'll just live with it=)
i hope i can larh. even if cant also must=) hah okay so we went to eat( belle mainey rice me ) okay i didnt eat cuz i wasnt hungry (lost appetite) yeah so we ate and chat till 3 plus thn went to
TIMEZ so that rice can get her CO thgs. but i not sure if she got buy at the end anot cuz me n belle went for badminton=) yeah and tt whn i really start to rmb all the great times. but with different ppl. the reason i say so is they all look the same as thy used to. but their inner self is a new character. well i'll drop the sub topic for now. haha so anw, we played badminton while the guys went for soccer. haha thn we played till 6 plus thn they played truth or truth. haha the whole game like me and belle the most safe one, cuz they got nthg much to ask us=X haha yeah. so aft it all arnd 7.10 we went home. haha thn on the bus me and belle stil continue to play^^ haha(really love her alot=)) haha yeah so now we are having a part II to the truth or truth on MSN. haha

*i didnt wanna things to go this way. but honestly i cant accept reality right now. i dont wanna get into any piece of shit installed for me yet. lets just say i'll go through it all when i'm braver. i dont regret what i've done. i'm just in this idiotic state cuz of the sudden rush of reality. i'm just pathetic right now. i cant eat,i cant sleep. i cant even cry when i want to. all i can do is smile, even when i'm at my worst. i'm such an idiot*